


The World Was to Me A Secret Which I Desired to Divine

by Anonymous



Series: Tales of Avonlea [1]
Category: Anne of Green Gables - L. M. Montgomery, Anne with an E (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Birthday, Canon Rewrite, Dancing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Ficlet Collection, Fluff, Gen, Kindred Spirits, Laughter, Missing Scene, Misunderstandings, Multi, Other, Pining, Smiles, Two oblivious idiots, Writing Prompt, general timeline with a twist, too soft to have actually happened
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-24
Updated: 2019-10-24
Packaged: 2021-01-02 02:23:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21154022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Set after 3x01Anne would've barreled right into the window if Gilbert hadn't acted on instinct and put himself between his classmate and her original target.This, however, resulted in her colliding with his chest at full speed.The impact made her head throb and caused her heart to flutter in her chest like a swarm of millions and millions of butterflies.Her cheeks crimsoned as she felt him lay his hands on her back to steady her.Gazing up into his eyes, she found him already looking down at her.Anne wondered if his eyes had always been the colour of golden tree resin and if, at some point, she'd be entitled to count the freckles dotted on his nose.or Anne rides to the Blythe farm to look after Delphine and to ask Gilbert to chaperone her to Charlottetown.





	The World Was to Me A Secret Which I Desired to Divine

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a few weeks since episode one aired but I finally managed to finish my first fanfiction for the AWAE fandom.  
Enjoy this writing prompt I got on Tumblr and let me know what you think! 
> 
> Writing prompt: Anne asking Gilbert to accompany her to Charlotte town?
> 
> Feedback is more than welcome!

"Oh, Belle I must admit to you that I didn't even dare to envision Marilla would let me go on my adventure -," Anne bend forward to stroke the chestnuts mane and sighed deeply, "Although of course, I'm ever so jubilant that she did!" 

She let her eyes wander over the landscape before looking to the horizon up ahead. If she squinted hard enough she could pretend to spot the Blythe-Lacroix farm. 

Solely the thought of asking Gilbert to accompany her to Charlottetown gave her goosebumps and made her fingertips tingle in anxiety.  
Yet there was no point in overthinking it, as he was one of the only reasons Marilla had even allowed to let her go.  
Anne could worry about a way to convince him to chaperone her on the train the entire day while helping Mary out.

Reminding herself of the true purpose of her visit, she shortened the reins and let Belle leap into a gallop.

Images of fairies with gowns as colourful as a flower field and creatures as fast as the wind arose in front of her eyes and fled past her, their faces frightful and their fine fabrics blowing in the wind like veils.  
In her mind, a black knight emerged from the woods.  
His sword was glinting in the morning sun and unearthly shadows were crawling at his feet. 

Their eyes met across the barren field.

A cold shiver ran down her spine as she clung to the reins and felt her heart pounding in her chest. She couldn't help but stare at his strange form and the black liquid oozing out of his mouth.  
Two black holes were where his eyes were meant to be, seeking to consume her wholly. 

From time to time even her fantasies, her sacred heaven terrified her to the bone.

It took her longer than usual to snap out of the daydream and the remnants of her imagination kept sticking to her skin like honey.  
Lately, it felt like her mind was turning into her prison.  
Dreams turned into nightmares or worse, reality.  
Ever since the day she was asked to present her lineage in class, she couldn't stop doubting herself and which ones of her memories were real and which ones were fabricated. 

Anne questioned her existence, her heritage but most importantly her mind.  
She questioned the one thing she had always been able to rely on, the one thing she had always trusted more than life itself.  
Thus demolished the walls of her safe haven, made her stumble and had her reaching out towards the darkness outside these walls.  
For the first time, she was stripped off her imagination and without Katie alongside her. She was alone.

Only when she could make out the rotten fence to the farm's border in the mere distance, did she feel composed enough to let Belle slow down and look back.  
Anne breathed deeply, a single tear running down her cheek as she laughed with relief.  
The nightmare had vanished and taken the knight with it.

Wiping her face clean of tears she made the horse fall into a trot, lastly being able to shake the remaining drops of honey off of her.

Mary and Bash greeted her with bright smiles mere seconds after Anne had knocked on the door.  
She glanced over her shoulder at Belle, noticing her head sticking out of the stable window and stepped inside. 

Immediately, she was drawn into a loving embrace by the Lacroix family. Their warmth spread through her body and laughter erupted out of her as they began to sing a birthday serenade.

As tiring as it might be to look after Delphine, spending time with her as well as her parents was one thing Anne would never want to trade for anything in the world.

Her eyes roamed around the kitchen and fleetingly up the stairs.  
There was no use in fooling Bash as she asked about Gilbert's whereabouts nonchalantly and intentionally ignored the knowing side glance he gave her in response.  
Apparently, Gilbert had been working on repairing his father's old tractor for the last few days and wouldn't be likely to join them for supper.  
Trying and failing to suppress the disappointment bubbling up inside her, she started to focus on Mary's instructions for the daily schedule instead. 

Absorbed inside her world, she didn't notice her friend approaching her until she stood right by her side at the sink.  
"Anne, are you alright?", Mary's voice was laced with genuine concern as she placed a hand on the redhead's shoulder, causing Anne to look up from cleaning Delphine's bottles.  
Though her hands were submerged in water, the bottles were untouched to her right. 

"Oh, Mary! I'm very sorry. I don't know what's gotten into me," she blurted and returned to her task right away.  
She started scrubbing the bottles furiously, oblivious to the silent tears streaming down her cheeks.  
Mary took her by the shoulders and gently turned her around.  
"Nonsense, Anne," she cupped the girl's cheeks and gave her a warm smile.  
"Please sit down and I'll put the kettle on. Then you can tell me what exactly has been bothering you."  
Leading Anne across the room, Mary made her sit down in the rocker in front of the chimney.

Anne was wearied, her emotions all over the place but that certainly didn't mean she'd allow Mary to pick up the chores she was meant to do herself.  
"No, Mary. I -. It's fine. I really shouldn't -," she started to protest but one look from the other woman silenced her.  
She looked at Delphine, peacefully sleeping in a basket to her left and relaxed. 

It didn't take long till Mary came back.  
Settling herself in the chair beside Anne, she gave her one of the steaming cups she was holding in her hands.

Silence fell over the room like a heavy layer of snow.  
All that could be heard was the sizzle of the fire and Dellie's faint snoring. 

"I went to the Indians village last week after the hockey play.  
A girl and her father came to sell sticks to some of the boys and I asked the girl, Ka'kwet if I could write an article about them for the Gazette," Anne began, her voice barely loud enough to be heard over the crackling of the fireplace.  
Mary's brows knitted in concern as she reached out to place a hand on her arm.  
She had never seen the ginger as troubled and quiet as today.  
It worried her.  
"Oh Mary, It was wonderful. The village is so charmingly different from everything else I've ever seen. Astonishingly fascinating and they're all so welcoming, particularly Ka'kwet. We're gonna be great friends I just know it!"  
Both women beamed for entirely different reasons.  
"We traded our possessions and oh, she was so delighted when I gave her my scarf that she proposed to weave her hair ties in my hair.  
I stayed for quite a while and she told me about her family and-," her voice caught in her throat and she exhaled sharply, clasping Mary's hand with her own.  
"- and about their similarities and I just couldn't help but think about mine," she smiled faintly, the usual glint in her eyes dimming by the second.  
"When I got home that evening I noticed Marilla and Matthew acting so alike, they appeared to be marionettes guided by an invisible puppeteer. I found it somewhat amusing at first-," she confessed teary-eyed and stared into the blaze, watching the dancing flames.

Mary's heart dropped into her stomach as she let Anne hold on to her. Finding her husband in the doorway, she shook her head insignificantly. Understanding her wordlessly, Bash left.  
Her heart flooded with love and pure devotion for her husband even more.

"- but then Ms Stacy asked us to talk about our lineage in class soon after and I didn't have anything to say. How could I? I'm an orphan!"

Outrage spread through Mary like a wildfire.  
Why would the teacher ask a student to present her lineage in front of the class, well aware that said student was an orphan?  
Mary knew Muriel as a kind and respectful woman but at this moment she was greatly angered by her.  
"Poor Ms Stacy, she pulled me aside afterwards because she felt so awful about forgetting it. She gave me the idea to search for records at the orphanage."  
Anne's spirit lifted distinctly and after minutes of averting Mary's gaze, she finally returned it.

"I'm sorry for being so emotional, it's hardly decent. I guess it was just a bit much because I rarely dared to dream about the possibility of finding some kind of information about my parents," she murmured and then didn't say anything for a while.

This time Mary didn't let her get too lost in her thoughts,  
"It's okay and understandable to worry, Anne. Having the desire to know about your heritage, to know who you are and where you came from makes you human. Your emotions are nothing to be ashamed of," she squeezed her hand.  
"They make you special. They make you who you are."

A sob left Anne's pink lips the moment she launched herself at Mary. Embracing her tightly, the feeling burned itself into Anne's memory and she promised herself to never let it go. 

They held each other unwaveringly, entirely unbothered by the time that passed as well as the fading flame.  
Eventually, Anne felt calm enough to let go.  
Her natural glow returned with a grin as Mary suggested to teach her a secret family recipe as a kind of birthday gift.

Both of them were humming a Canadian tune, spinning around the kitchen and passing cooking utensils between them by the time Bash appeared in the doorway.  
Recognizing the ongoing act promptly for what it was, he smirked and skipped into the room.  
Hastily flinging his hat aside, he took his wife by the waist and twirled her until she began to sway dizzily in his arms.  
Their joyous laughter echoed throughout the house whilst Anne continued to hum and to clap.

She was so entranced in the scene that she didn't sense Gilbert hovering in the doorway, let alone him watching her.  
Her eyes glistened with excitement when Bash feigned to bow in front of her and took her by the hand to spin her too.  
Time seemed to freeze as she closed her eyes and savoured the moment of pure bliss.  
In that instant, nothing else mattered.  
She had no worries, no doubts and no fears. 

Negligently tripping over a bump on the floor she would've barreled right into the window if Gilbert hadn't acted on instinct and put himself between his classmate and her original target.  
This, however, resulted in Anne colliding with his chest at full speed.  
The impact made her head throb and caused her heart to flutter in her chest like a swarm of millions and millions of butterflies. 

Her cheeks crimsoned as she felt him lay his hands on her back to steady her.  
Glancing up into his eyes, she found him already looking down at her. Anne wondered if his eyes had always been the colour of golden tree resin and if, at some point, she'd be entitled to count the freckles dotted on his nose. 

It was for Bash clearing his throat and therefore snapping her out of her fantasies, that she realized she was still holding on to Gilbert's shoulders.  
Feeling his body tremble below her fingertips she looked up again and froze.  
His eyes were closed as he tossed his head back and roared with laughter.  
Anne couldn't help but stare, marvelling at the length of his eyelashes and only letting go of him as she felt his grip on her loosen. 

Wrath and uncertainty made her blood boil and she pursed her lips.  
How utterly offensive of him to laugh at her! Who on earth did he think he was? Having the audacity to make her feel so embarrassed was shameful! 

Almost tripping anew in her haste to get away from him, she tried to calm her racing heart but to no avail. 

His hazel eyes found her blue ones.  
All her rage towards him dissipated as soon as she stared into his eyes and was reminded of an autumnal forest. 

"Gilbert," she breathed.  
He smiled softly, tilting his head.  
"Anne."

For once he was the first to turn away whilst she simmered with emotions.  
Her mind was overflowing with thoughts, her skin prickling in awareness of his presence and her heart doing somersaults.  
Subconsciously, she could hear him offering to set the table, but even concentrating on the simplest things was impossible.  
She had never felt anything as intense as this before. 

An unmistakable cry ringing out, had her straightening up in a heartbeat. Looking over her shoulder at Gilbert and Mary busily preparing dinner and noting Bash's sudden absence, she scurried to the infant and lifted her out of the crib.

"Hush Dellie, hush," she whispered, tenderly caressing her cheek.  
Rocking her benevolently in her arms, Anne began to sing a lullaby she'd first used in a household to very different circumstances.

"Lavender's blue, dellie-dellie  
Lavender's green  
When I am queen, dellie-dellie,  
You shall be too  
Whoa-oh, who told me so?  
Dellie-Dellie  
Who told me so?  
T'was my own heart,  
Dellie-Dellie  
That told me so." 

She giggled proudly about having turned the lullaby into something special.  
Gilbert studied her from afar as he leant against the table and dazedly followed her movements with his eyes. 

"If you love me,  
Dellie-Dellie  
I will love you.  
Let the birds sing,  
Dellie-Dellie,  
Let the lambs play.  
We shall be safe,  
Dellie-Dellie  
Out of harms way."

Anne swayed the baby in her arms and nudged her nose gingerly.  
Her feet moved on their own accord and she felt herself slipping away into an imaginary kingdom the longer she gazed into Delphine's rich brown eyes.

Three additional voices tuned in as she continued with the last verse, their glowing smiles could've lit up all of Avonlea.

"Lavender's blue, dellie-dellie  
Lavender's green  
When I am queen, dellie-dellie  
You shall be too  
Whoa-oh who told me so?  
Dellie-Dellie  
Who told me so?  
T'was my own heart,  
Dellie-Dellie  
That told me so." 

Dinner went by without further ado and both Bash and Gilbert repeatedly complimenting Anne's cooking skills.  
Bashfully accepting them, she made sure to thank Mary for the lesson. After all, it wouldn't have tasted as delicious as it did, if it hadn't been for the freshly roasted peppers Anne had used to season the appetizer.  
She'd stayed noticeably silent during dinner, only offering her opinion on a couple of topics but not inserting herself as much in the conversations as usual. For her attention was entirely on Gilbert's presence next to her. 

Eventually, one look outside the window was enough to set Anne in motion. "Oh no, no, no."  
She stood abruptly, looking across the laid table at Bash and then at his wife standing behind him.  
"I'm greatly sorry for my outrageous behaviour but it seems I forgot the time! Marilla had wanted me home at sunset," she announced rather worried.  
Mary assured her that it was alright to leave and pulled the girl into a swift hug before she was able to rush out of the house.  
Only just managing to grab her coat from the wardrobe, Anne called a quick goodbye over her shoulder and bolted out of the door.

Gilbert gaped after her, still seated at the table.  
Opposite him, Bash cleared his throat while Mary chuckled lowly.  
"What are you waitin` for Blythe?," he teased.  
He didn't need to be told twice.  
Reaching for Anne's hat, placed and then forgotten on the chair beside him, he stood up to follow her outside. 

Anne was already harnessing her horse when he joined her.  
Her eyes darted from the hat he was wearing, her hat, to the saddle he tried to give to her.  
"Thank you but I'm perfectly capable of doing that myself," she said briskly and took it from his arms.  
Her face remained stoic even as she took a second to adjust her grip before placing the saddle on Belle's back.  
"I know you are, Anne," he replied kindly.

Gilbert could nearly see the gears turning in her mind and observed the way her posture unwound.  
Stepping forward, he didn't wait for her approval and took ahold of the rains.

"I- Thank you," she smiled and swung herself on it's back.  
Fully aware of the implication behind her words, he gave her one in return. 

Belle grew restless whilst they stared at each other, her hooves scraping over the soil and her tail whirling back and forth.  
Remembering the true reason for Anne's extended visit, she raised her voice and gripped the horse's mane tighter.  
The moment in which she would lay her heart at his feet and bear herself open like a book had come.  
Now it was on him to decide whether to pick it up or stomp on it. 

"May I ask you a favour, Gilbert?"  
Not giving him the time to respond, she added, "You don't have to do it obviously,-"  
"Anne."  
"But it would mean a great deal to me. I'd be ever so grateful!"  
"Anne."  
"And I promise it's hardly even a favour, really just a convenience that's all-."  
"Anne!"

She paused, her eyes widening coyly and then dropping to the ground.  
He listened to her heavy breathing as worry burdened his heart.

"Please, will you just ask me?," he breathed, an encouraging smile tugging at his lips.  
Anne chuckled nervously.  
"Well, I was wondering if you - no I - if I could accompany you to Charlottetown next Saturday?"  
"You are asking me to chaperone?," he questioned and tried to swallow the dash of hope welling up inside him.

A wisp of hair fell into her eyes as she nodded.  
Taking notice of the defiance brewing in her eyes, he moved closer to the horse and put the hand that wasn't holding the reins, on its smooth neck.  
Close enough to feel the warmth radiating off of Anne but far enough to be considered proper.  
It would be so easy to reach for her hand, yet he didn't.

"Of course I will, Anne," he stated.  
Had it been in a different situation, he'd have snickered about her need to outdo him in something as simple as a conversation.  
Mischievously grinning he continued, "On one condition."  
Anne rolled her eyes, a glint of amusement flickering in them.  
"I'll meet you at Green Gables and bring you back afterwards."

Gilbert's heart rate quickened as she raised her brows, "That's a peculiar condition to request."  
Truthfully he was well aware of that but if he had the chance to be alone with Anne, he might as well make the best out of it.  
"Are you sure, you wouldn't prefer an orange or- or a chocolate bar?," she sought.  
The puzzlement on her face was as clear as day.  
He shook his head.  
"I'm sure. I like spending time with you," he admitted hoarsely.  
Saying it aloud for the first time made his voice as well as his legs shaky.  
"Oh, okay," she squeaked, her cheeks flushing red.  
Surprised by the foreign sound passing her lips, his hold on the bridles slackened and his stance faltered. 

Anne took this as a chance to mutter her thanks before reversing Belle and urging her into a gallop.  
As the wind grasped at her clothes and pulled on her hair, she wondered about the reason why she hadn't told him the truth about her visit to Charlottetown.

Gilbert watched her leave until the darkness took her captive.  
"Happy Birthday, Anne," he whispered.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it!
> 
> Please leave kudos and comments. I would greatly appreciate it! :)
> 
> Authors note: The Lullaby 'Lavender's Blue' does not belong to me I merely used and changed it for the story.


End file.
